I’ve finally gotten to the point where I’ve had to create a points-and-reward system for the kids. And I hate that I have to do it.
I am a responsible person and believe that I’ve always been that way. I’m sure there were times in my childhood when I didn’t do what I was supposed to, but for the most part I think I’ve always been the kind of person who could be counted on. I believe I’m one of those people who gets things done because they have to get done not because I’ll get something (other than the satisfaction of a job well done) in return.
No. 1 is 8 and No. 2 is 5. They are old enough to incur some responsibilities around the house. I believe that these are crucial ages to instill responsbility in the kids and to let them know that there is no free ride. Perhaps I’m old fashioned or too strict, but that’s the way I am.
I’ve struggled for a long time with how to separate chores you do because you’re part of the family and they need to get done and chores you do that you can get paid for. At this point, their chores are all the ones that you do because you’re part of this family. I couldn’t justify giving an allowance when (a) we buy the kids nearly everything the need and (b) when the things I ask them to do are pretty easy and age-appropriate.
At the same time, they need to be recognized for their efforts so they do understand the value of a reward and a job well done. So I’ve lamented and created a system that awards points for certain jobs; a certain number of points earned equals a reward. For No. 1, who seems to be having some issues at school, he will have a separate points system for the classroom.
I feel almost like a failure as a mother because it has come to this, but reality tells me that I’m actually a good mom for realizing that this system needs to be implemented.
What do you do for your kids? How do you encourage them to be responsible little people?
